It has broken my heart!
While surprised, I'm also perplexed. Have I just over identified with the characters?
The parents. The sister.
The young man himself.
The people along the way that he meets, and changes, and leaves.
It it just that I have a son the same age? Facing the same time in his life? Nah. It's deeper.
Why is it that we so stubbornly hold to our story/wound until the very end? We seem to get it in those last moments. And then what? SO WHAT. We are dead. "Oh! Got it!" With our last breath. Why are we so freaking stubborn?
It's about a strong willed young man, who makes his mind up, and sets out on a grand adventure. I wanted a happy ending. I always want a happy ending. Damn it, I believe in happy endings.
Hand me the cosmic red pen! But it was his story, and his choice, and all we can do is witness. Sometimes...I hate the place of witness.
I wrote a story years and years and years ago when I was about eighteen, about an old man that was a 'watcher'. His sole purpose was to witness everything that happened outside his window for the cosmic plan, and never under any circumstances get involved or change anything.
And then one day, he gets involved...and oh the mess that he makes of things.
But sometimes, it's so hard to leave people to their pride and arrogant rightness that they are wounded or hurt beyond repair, or sick. I watched the movie, and saw so many young men and women that I know on that screen, and realized that they all are walking into their own Alaskan wilderness.
And we are left wondering and waiting and witnessing. Stupid position to be in isn't it? Shit. I don't think I much like the God-place, leaving people their free-will.
We get beautiful young people killing themselves with shotguns, and handguns-(not the movie)
We get beautiful young people drinking and drugging themselves into heaps of misery-(not the movie)
We get beautiful young people that die before they have even lived their life. Died before they understand that this life, this magnificent choice we came here to live, is about FEELING! It's about CONNECTING, and TOUCHING, and BEING TOUCHED. It's about being ALIVE. It's about choice.
Why do we so insist on being miserable sometimes, and how do we wake them up? How do we do that for anyone? Shit. We can't! That's the heartbreak.
2 comments:
This is the movie Bo and I were talking about in class. Not the latest one, August Rush, but before that. We had talked about how he said he created his own happiness until he went to the wild and then he thought happiness was only real when shared, a complete reversal of his previous belief. It is a great movie. I loved it. AND what I loved about it is that is does make you feel and think what life is all about and what free will and choices we make will and do effect the rest of our life. It is heartbreaking that so many young people are so disturbed by life that they must numb themselves.
or run away.
This movie was so much a reinactment of my father's journey-only he lived.
He might not have, and if he hadn't none of us would be here now. That's my point in the long run I suppose.
My father was food poisoned at one point, and laid in a barn in Yugoslavia in the rain alone, and survived. Of course, he hadn't eaten poisonous roots...
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